Kingdom Kalls Part 2

Within days of becoming well, I scooped up my Bible with gratitude. I honestly felt like Ebenezer Scrooge in Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol." Waking up I had a new goal to prioritize my time, REALLY prioritize. Like you, a lot of opportunities come my way & I felt like I WAS a good steward of my time. However, now I had a new measuring stick to help me even further because God had given me a word for which to gauge my commitments along with a sense of urgency. Everything to which I would now strive to commit would be measured against this word.

My word was "reach" and a sense of urgency accompanied it.  Are the things that I am committing to helping to reach people for the kingdom of heaven, and I mean really reach, not be satisfied that I was active in my church and ministering on my mission field at home as a stay-at-home, homeschooling mother alone. Seeking God and sharing Him had to become my full-time occupation. I was even more burdened than before to know God's Word so that I could share it, everyday to someone, somewhere. I needed it. Others needed it. It was life and I couldn't be caught up in being busy ONLY serving the same people around me all the time. Please don't misunderstand, I realize my family is my first responsibility and therefore my first priority. However, God was calling me to drop other THINGS in exchange for other PEOPLE, His lost people. God had given me a sense of claustrophobia in my regular circles, all of them. Being in bed sick for seven weeks had shown me that it was uncomfortable to lay around and do nothing. Yes, rest is important and yes relaxing is enjoyable, but I felt I had been relaxing the last yr so now it was time to get busy. I was healthy again and I felt a renewed sense to submerge myself in His Word, to put Him first in the morning and just sit there and soak Him in so I could share it with others everywhere.

Because God knows I am a visual person, several pictures were forming in my mind that carried the same theme so I knew it was Him working in my heart. I had visions of a modern day emergency room triage nurse & a telephone operator from some old black and white movie. I asked myself what the two had in common. I realized in order to do their jobs, they had to focus and prioritize.

Obviously, everyone needing a triage nurse assessment was sick. But there were those that were dying. Every phone call that came into one of the old timey operators was important, but there were those that were urgent. I could picture myself alongside these imaginary ladies too. Everything was important, but which calls were urgent? Where these the calls I would answer first? I too had to focus and prioritize to a level that made it a skill, just like these pictures in my heart.
And now that I knew the questions, what were my answers? Thankfully, I knew that too. I would answer the urgent calls, the kingdom kalls. Sometimes, it just took something for God to get our attention, maybe a health scare or maybe even just a misspelled word (kalls.) Have a great day!

Sitting at the masters feet,
~Clarissa 

Kingdom Kalls Part 1

A few months ago, I got sick. Really sick. It wasn't just an illness. My spiritual gift of discernment was telling me this was bad. I could literally sense something around me and the fact that I was downplaying it was opposite my excitable nature. I saw a side of my husband that after 12 years of marriage, I had never seen before. His eyes revealed genuine fear. I wondered if he was thinking how his mother had been diagnosed with cancer and had died less than three months later. He was quiet and lost in thought. My doctor became nervous and my insurance agent was alarmed when I called her to add life insurance & cancer policies "just in case."

Around week six, lying in bed trying to make sense of what was going on, a thought popped into my head. "I may very well meet God face to face without having read His autobiography."

I wasn't nervous like a kid having to give an oral book report on a book I hadn't read. It wasn't like being a famous television host interviewing a celebrity about her latest book on live TV. No, it was sadness. It was more than sadness, it was regret.

I had regret that I had been too busy. I had regret that I had assumed I would be guaranteed tomorrow to read my Bible, that same book my mama gave me when I was 13 and just blossoming into the youth group at our church. That was 21 years ago, two decades and a year AGO. Had I been productive? Yes. I would call college and raising a family productive. Was what I was doing important? Yes, true there too. However, I felt my time was very possibly almost up and all I knew was I felt very sad I had not read God's word cover to cover. I had regret that I hadn't told Him how much He meant to me and how I loved Him so by spending time with Him. I wanted to hang onto His every word and now, I might not have that chance. My heart ached.

THANKFULLY, I am all better now! All tests results came back okay and my health returned to that of a normal 34 yr-old! Something is different though, very different and I didn't quite realize the scope of it until today. I'll tell you more about that & explain the crazy spelling in the title, tomorrow in part 2! See ya soon.

Sitting at the masters feet,
~Clarissa

Suffering in Silence (Warning: Adult Subject Matter)

I was driving to a meeting in November. Since the location was about 30 minutes away and I had some spare time, I attempted to call a friend who hadn't been returning my emails or phone calls. I was beginning to worry. Needless to say, I had to pull over when she said her recently turned 10-yr-old, (and my daughter's good friend), had been sexually molested by the host and parent of another child at a 4th grade school cheerleading sleep-over the month prior. My friend hadn't called because they had been trying to cope with the gravity of the situation.

I was devastated for our friend's daughter. I was devastated for her parents and her siblings.  I was mad at the enemy who is the devil and evil one and who roams about like a lion seeking who and what he may steal, kill and destroy. I was mad how he held such a grip of prolonged sin without conviction on this man's life.  My head was filled with questions. "Why Lord?"

A few weeks later as if He didn't know, I told God that in a case unrelated to my friend's, there was a teacher in our same community arrested on charges of molesting 20 girls that was now all over the local news. "Lord," I asked. "What is going on here? How big is this? Where are you???? How can these men be so active in their community, in their churches, accepting awards for their careers with no conviction and continuing their behavior?! Don't they care? Don't you God?"

And while still heartbroken, even for these men's own families and especially their children, I had peace in knowing that God DOES see. No one can fool Him, deceive Him or hide from Him although many have tried, as recorded in God's Word.

In Acts chapter 5, a married couple Ananias and Sapphira both fell dead when they lied to the Holy Spirit about the amount of  money they had collected from the sale of some land. In Genesis chapter 4, Cain tells God he doesn't know where his brother is, only to have the Lord reply that He knows he murdered him and that his brother Abel's blood calls to Him from the ground. A chapter before that in Genesis 3, God asks Adam and Eve where they are although He knows. As you know, they were hiding due to their nakedness that was revealed to them when they disobeyed God and ate of the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

God knows and even if it doesn't seem like it to us, He is working behind the scenes for salvation, justice and healing. We just have to trust Him. We just have to trust Him.

If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual abuse,  please call 1-800-656-HOPE, which is the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network http://www.rainn.org/ I found online. I also heard about the Darkness to Light organization at http://www.d2l.org/site/c.4dICIJOkGcISE/b.6035035/k.8258/Prevent_Child_Sexual_Abuse.htm
Both can be found on Facebook and Twitter. Keep these families in your prayers and talk to your kids about the fallen world we live in so they too, may be harmless as doves, but wise as serpents.

Sitting at the masters feet,
~Clarissa